How do we change people? Some religions believe in coercion, or elimination of people who do not believe in their religion. We see this in the Islam religion today. Christianity is not exempt from blame; remember the crusades of the Middle Ages, and the treatment of Native Americans by the Christian missionaries. History confirms that all these attempts to change others only resulted in suffering and more resistance.
Some believe that if we want to change people, we start from within. We need to change ourselves. We need to initially remove the evil within us to make changes in others. These evils are the removal of the dusts (thoughts) of arrogance, greed, and self love.
For example, there was a couple that was on the verge of getting a divorce. The husband went to a minister to complain about his wife. He was told to remove arrogance from his mind, and to treat his wife with kindness, even when she was argumentative. Why remove arrogance? Arrogance, or the feeling that one is right, or superior leads to anger when confronted with inconvenience. Initially, it was very difficult for the man not to have anger when his wife was confrontational. But as he gradually removed arrogance from his mind, anger and animosity disappeared that was directed toward his wife. Surprisingly, his wife began to have kindness toward him. This is a story I read from a religious pamphlet, but I believe it holds true in real life. Positive change comes from within.